In turning my will and my life over to the care of God (as I understood Him) isn’t always an easy thing to do. I keep taking back control - or did I never fully give it up to begin with?
If I need accounting advice I go to my accountant. If I need legal advice I go to a lawyer. And if I need cooking advice, I go to Ms. Ray.. lol. But if I need advice on beating this drinking thing, on becoming recovered from the state that I was in, from escaping death that I was living. Then I go to someone who knows how to count, leagize, cook and get sober. Period.
Do you rely compleyely on self sufficeincy? Or do you have aworking knowledge of the 12 Steps and have you formed a relationship with a Higher Power that works miricals in your life?
“We admitted we were powerless over alcohol…”
The Doctor’s Opinion, xxv-xxxii.
ii
“…that our lives had become unmanageable.”
Chapter 3: More About Alcoholism, 30-43.
Living in the solution is the answer to all of your problems. Living in the Soltuion is simply doing the oposite of what you’ve been doing all of your life, living in the problem, suffering, obsessing, agonizing. Your reward for all of that unhealthy living was to have anxiety, anger and depression. Your reward for living in the solution is to have peace of mind, to feel healthy and vibrant, to be spiritually connected and wholly useful.
Although we like to think that the people in our lives are well-adjusted, happy, healthy minded individuals, we sometimes realize that it just isn’t so. Personally, I’ve had moments where I’ll be skipping through my day, happy as can be, thinking life is grand and BAM, I’ll be blindsided by someone who manages to knock the happy wind out of my sails. Sometimes it is easy to write it off and other times, not so much.
Someone to have considered themselves done with the work, simply still doesn’t get it. The old solution for us was to drink, the new solution is to not. The old solution for us was to be selfish, the new solution is to be selfless. The old solution for us was to be self-centered, the new solution for us is to be God-Centered. The old solution for us was to be delusional, the new solution for us is to turn our thinking and our will over to the care and understabnding of God and to remain open to His will for us.
Having no reservations or no lurking notions of any kind. The process that brings us to purpose of being free, the freedom from self, the bondage of self. The self is the selfish needs of a person living in fear, the fear of not getting what we want or what we think we need, a fear that a loving God won’t fulfill these needs if we were to have a faith that works in our life.
Two opposites cannot inhabit the same person simultaniously. Happy/Sad, Angry/Friendly, Depressed/Elated. So when we are working selflessly with another Alcoholic, and giving of ourselves, our time and our energy without any desired compensation, then the selfishness that used to encompass the whole of our character slowly begins to die off.
I suffer from a spiritual malady that only a spiritual experience can grant me a daily reprieve based soley on my constant effort to enlarge uppon my spiritual life. Half measures avail me nothing. I cannot get sober on yesterdays work, no more than I can get a full stomache on yesterdays meal.